maypirate

Man, last week happened and I didn't really accomplish much of anything. I'm in a terrible creative drought (I know, but worse than usual, really) and I mostly just lay around and watched "Spartacus: Sex and Profanity" and poked at "Fruit Ninja" and "Bejeweled" on the Kikipod.

To spare everyone the whining, I'll get it over with quickly: boo boo boo I suck at fandom and I'll never write or be creative again everything sucks.

Anyway.

I promised the tale of

jou and I dumpster diving last week, and so it shall be. We wandered far and wide, from the frats and co-ops to university-type housing, up and down hills, across the Square. But the journey itself is not as interesting as what we found (the things we actually kept are denoted with a "*"):

-Some posters, one of a famous painting of a guy standing on a cliff over the sea*
-A stairstep basket*
-A half-used bottle of lube
-A still-working finger vibrator (don't worry, we were wearing rubber gloves)
-At least four microwaves
-Shoes that were way too big
-Ants. Oh god, ants.
-A vodka bottle shaped like an assault rifle
-Old underwear, both men's and women's, including bras of all kinds and at least one thong
-A bunch of empty DVD cases
-Lots of bathroom products: shampoo, sponges, soaps, etc.
-A dark blue hoodie with a faded star pattern*
-A yellow "California" shirt (from Cal Berkeley)*
-5 beer pitchers from the student union that can be redeemed for $1 each*
-A blank wooden plaque suitable for crafting*
-Small pictures for collaging*
-2 garlands of fake flowers*
-2 beer glasses from local bars*
-Slipper-shoe things*
-3 perfectly good dresses*
-1 brown flowy peasant skirt*
-1 lacy dress thing with a top that turned out to be really stretched out but maybe can be fixed*
-A blouse*
-Lounge pants*
-A tan shirt with a silver sequined collar* (I'm wearing it right now!)
-A good pair of black sketchers slip on shoes*
-A Mortal Kombat comic book from the early 90's* (it was given as a present to

infinityduck)
-Rotting meat saran-wrapped to a plate and sdhfskdhks it was so awful we both screamed
-Lots and lots of (generally meat-free) dishes
-Some good coffee tables
-Furniture that seemed like it could have been donated but no, college kids are wasteful
-A book on architectural design*
-A box of 2010-2011 day planners
-Lots of old notebooks, course papers, etc (but sadly no textbooks that could be turned in for dollars)
-A picture frame*
-More old condiments/kitchen cabinet goods/empty liquor bottles than can ever really be counted

I'm sure there was more, but that's all I can really remember. The horrormeat was notable, as was the working vibrator. By the end we were very tired and had drinks with

infinityduck, then went home to collapse. It was probably my most productive "Hippie Christmas" in several years and I was glad for the company since last year I had to do it on my own.

I have all of one day off from now until Sept. 2nd, and I intend to use it to clean all the things since

feels_like_fire will be moving in prooobably this coming weekend. She is my new Danielle, only taller and more actually around! It will be an adventure no doubt. I wish I could help her drive across the country, but sadly, there is acid to be mined.