Apr. 21st, 2011

maypirate: (Reverie)
Last night I was talking to [livejournal.com profile] sink_or_swim about old times and I remembered I fight that I had with people on [livejournal.com profile] churchofelric four years ago.

And I realized...I'm not even sure what I realized. I guess I realized I'm sorry for what I said, how I said it, and how I failed to be articulate and rational. I'm sorry for upsetting people. To be honest, I barely remembered what I'd done, but once reminded I just sort of feel stupid and impossibly young. In the course of that fight I was told to "grow the fuck up," which was hard because I thought I was mature when I was 24, when I was alone and on my own in grad school. I was wrong.

I just wanted to say to anyone who still remembers that, or thinks about it bitterly, that I'm sorry. I was in a dark place and I'm only realizing now how dark it was, and how poorly I acted when I was there. I've been trying to grow the fuck up for a long time now, and I realize that I have a long way to go, and it's going to be many years before I come anywhere close.

But I'm trying, and I'm learning from my mistakes. It's a process.

We have come to terms.
maypirate: (Plans and punching)
This morning I did some pruning of my flist, mostly people with whom I haven't spoken in a long time/with whom I don't seem to share interests/LJs that haven't been updated in ages. If I made a mistake in unfriending you, though, please let me know! These events can be changed!

My coworker for yesterday afternoon wasn't feeling well, so she decided not to come in and found no one to cover for her. And then my boss decided not to come in until 3:30. And everyone in the world returned their movies. This is a beautiful summary of my general state:

[livejournal.com profile] maypirate: URGH MY FAVORITE FRY PLACE WAS CLEANING THEIR GREASE TRAP
[livejournal.com profile] maypirate: AND THEN THERE WAS A LINE
[livejournal.com profile] maypirate: SHGKSJH
[livejournal.com profile] maypirate: MY BOSS STILL IS NOT HERE
[livejournal.com profile] maypirate: MY JOB IS DUMB
[livejournal.com profile] starsandgraces: HOW DARE THEY
[livejournal.com profile] maypirate: ENDLESS CUSTOMER ONSLAUGHT
[livejournal.com profile] maypirate: I AM FUCKING EATING A NAKED HOT DOG OFF A PLASTIC FORK, PEOPLE
[livejournal.com profile] maypirate: GO AWAY
[livejournal.com profile] starsandgraces: I am stunned by your level of dignity

I'm a model of decorum and tranquility on any given day. But now I have a [livejournal.com profile] sink_or_swim. This morning I tried to wake her up by putting Nicky in her face. They both just looked confused and wanted no part of my hilarious antics.

For breakfast today, I made friends with my suspect peanut butter again. PB and Matzah: breakfast of champions. Champion LOSERS OOHHHH.

And scene.

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